Reaching Out To Others - Stake Conference - November 2011

I am glad to see so many close friends out there; it helps me feel a little less terrified.  I can only hope that we can feel the spirit together and that it will uplift and inspire us.

Years ago on a cold Christmas eve, my 3 yr old son lay in bed with pneumonia.  I was a single mom, with little means.  A few Matchbox cars lay wrapped under the tree.  The missionaries came and sang Christmas carols to him. It was one of my favorite Christmases!

Way past dark, footsteps came down the hall, and a knock on my door revealed a few kids, dressed as men in large hats and coats and beards. They left 5 bags of food and goodies, and left as quickly as they came, wishing me a Merry Christmas.

I told myself right there and then, I wanted to try and give more; though I had no money, time, nor talent that I knew of.  I was so very touched by their act of kindness.

The subject of my talk is Reaching out to Others. 

The best place to start with this subject is INTENTION, why should we reach out?  What is our real, pure motive? 

In Institute a few weeks ago, we were reminded of that on-going, ever-lasting question that Cain asked the Lord, “Am I my brother’s keeper?”  Indeed, we are!  We don’t have to look far in this world of ours to see loneliness, sorrow, suffering, pain, and conflict.

Virginia H Pearce, a former counselor in the General YW Presidency, said, “We all have a responsibility to make a difference, to lift someone.  We are all in this together to work out our salvation, to reach our potential, and to be our brother’s keeper.”

To do this, we must learn to see others better than we already do, and in a different way, with more spiritual eyes.

I like the BYU TV motto that is played often on their channel, challenging us as they repeat:  See the Good in the World.

A popular young adult fiction series called Fablehaven, which is written by a LDS author named Brandon Mull, uses an analogy to represent seeing with more spiritual eyes.  When his characters drink the milk of a magic cow, their eyes are open, and they can see fairies, brownies, and all sorts of magical fey creatures that mortal eyes cannot see.  In the scriptures, we find that Enoch was told to anoint his eyes with clay, that he may see, and wow!  He got to see all kinds of wonderful visions, not visible to the natural eye!  We can read many references to our ‘eyes being open, or having eyes, and not being able to see, and ears, and not being able to hear’ throughout the scriptures.

Even in classic novel Camelot, Merlin taught Arthur to live his life as an eagle so he can see a different perspective of people.

Henry B Eyring said, “God will help us see a difference in someone else not as a source of irritation, but as a contribution.”

It was said of Sister Hinckley, “she simply is unable to see the bad in people.  Sister Hinckley herself said, “Let’s be kind to people, for most of us are fighting a hard battle.”

Can we look around and see and feel what the people around us are battling?

I enjoy little optical illusions and things like Magic Eye, where we can see things that aren’t really there, yet are, when looking at them in a different way.  In order for us to be able to reach out and love others, we must first learn to look at others with our spiritual eyes, and see them as Christ sees them.

We can sharpen our skill at seeing people in a different light.

Linda and Richard Eyre, in the book, Teaching your Children Charity” teach: “The gift and skill of visualization is at the heart of our potential ability to feel as others feel.” They played a game with their children called Put Yourself in the Picture.  It is much like that old cliché’, ‘walk a mile in their shoes’. Also, in their family prayers, they would focus more on how to help a neighbor than on what to ask for for themselves.

People can see and feel God’s love for them through us.

Jeffery R Holland- “We are reminded that not all angels are from the other side of the veil.  Some of them walk and talk with us, here, now, everyday.  Heaven never seems closer than when we see the love of God manifested in the kindness and devotion of people so good and so pure that angelic is the only word that comes to mind.”

His quote reminded me of the Primary song, I’ll Walk with You. 

“If you don’t walk as most people do, some people walk away from you, but I won’t, I won’t.  I’ll walk with you, I’ll talk to you, that ‘s how I’ll show my love for you.”

That seems pretty simple.  All this can start with a basic desire to reach out and be more Christ like; to uplift those you meet, to be more friendly and kind, to recognize those who may need a hand, or even just a smile.

 Enos had such a desire for the welfare of his brethren that he did pour out his whole soul unto God for them.

Elder Bednar tells us about his sweet wife in his talk, Quick to Observe.  “Before attending her sacrament meeting, Sister Bednar frequently prays for the spiritual eyes to see those who have a need. Often as she observes… she will feel a spiritual nudge to visit with or make a phone call to a particular person.”

Those are easy things that most of us can do.  We can practice daily. We can pray for the gift of being quick to observe. 

Nelson Mandela said:  “We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone.  And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.”

“For I was an hungered, and you gave me meat; I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink; I was a stranger, and ye took me in; naked, and ye clothed me; I was sick, and ye visited me; I was in prison, and ye came unto me..”

Thus the original question preserved in the scriptures for us is also answered in the scriptures for us. The Lord asks us to be our brother’s keepers!

In our small quiet acts of service, our hearts are being polished and molded as we help others.

Like the famous Grinch, if our hearts are too small, we can enlarge them. 

I think the Lord is more interested in our hearts than in all of our little trivial daily comfort levels and issues.  We can desire and pray for these changes in our hearts.

All of us our looking for those smiles, those hugs, and enjoying a friendship where we know the person knows are true self and still loves us.  Our testimonies are based on knowing that God himself loves us.  We sing about wanting that ‘Calm assurance that He cares’.  We have hope that He will smile upon us someday.  We read that He will wipe away our tears.  These comforting thoughts carry us through this life of good vs. evil.  Christ was perfect at knowing how we feel.

 It is always with tears in my eyes that I sing  the song, “I Stand all Amazed”  I am amazed at the love Jesus offers me and everyone, because He can do it, and I can’t.  It always brings me to repentance and the desire to do better.

When I feel hurt and lonely and sad, I truly do feel His love and can hear Him say, “I’ll walk with you, I’ll talk with you.. I know, I know how you feel.”

I’d like to share two personal experiences of when someone touched my heart.

They say that people may not always remember what you say, but will always remember the way you made them feel.

1.     One time I was in the Manhattan temple, working as an ordinance worker, and my assignment at that moment was the Celestial room.  We were asked to open the door for people when they leave the room. A young man that I had never seen before, and did not particularly pay any attention to before, came up to leave.  He extended his hand to shake mine, which I took, and he looked me deeply in the eyes. I can still feel that feeling today, as I write; some kind of intense feeling of love, acceptance, and a pureness that we don’t often get to feel in this world; even knowledge of some sort, but of what, I am not sure.  Did I know him in the pre-mortal world? Was he just a kind man, or an earthly angel- put there by the Lord that day to offer me love? I will always remember what I felt that day.

2.     Last year, I was on a plane by myself, and cheerfully passing through an airport. I was heading toward my gate, and a middle aged man held open a door for me. This was more about his smile than his eyes, but it had the same effect. He smiled at me, and it filled me with warmth and joy.  It was not a flirtatious smile, nor an attempt to get to know me, or even speak to me. It was a look and a smile that just brings pure joy to one’s soul.  It made my heart happy, and changed my whole day.  I was already happy, but now I was looking at the world with even more spiritually-minded eyes.

I know firsthand what a kind word, smile, and friendship can do.

I can tell you that there are earthly angels among us in this Stake.  I have had many in my life.  The words from the scriptures come to mind that say ‘words cannot describe’ about how I will feel when the Savior looks at me and smiles at me.